Reviewing 2025.
2025 was dominated largely by personal development and growth instead of creative output that I could showcase.
It's not that I didn't do anything: my task tracker tells me that I've completed over 800 tasks and I only started tracking in March. Averaging at three intentional tasks per day, not taking all the smaller things into account that come up in between, I am yet again surprised by the amount of things I seem to be doing.
Three aspects took up most of my focus in 2025:
Divorce
By far the most mentally and emotionally taxing challenge was to deal with the aftermath of the 2023 breakup with my 15 year long partner and mother of our now 12 year old son. After two years I finally managed to push through the divorce — a long, frustrating and painful process that I am so glad to have put behind me.
This process also made me realize again how incredibly lucky I am for having a support network and financial stability — a priviledge that cannot be overstated. But I am also proud that I asked for help when I needed it. And I needed a lot.
But I also grew a lot: I trained in non-violent communication and learned to identify emotional triggers and how to untangle hard-trained toxic relationship dynamics. I learned how to respond, or rather not-respond, to attacks or what my system interpreted as attacks, how to better set boundaries and how to de-escalate interpersonal conflicts. It's been incredibly challenging at times, but just as much educational.
I am thankful for all the good things that emerged from this relationship — just as much as I am happy to close this chapter of my life.
Community Housing
The second biggest topic of the year was that of my new relationship(s) and our common dream of building a community living space by renovating an old house.
This dream became reality surprisingly fast by the beginning of the year. We were able to aquire a beautiful village house built in 1887 with a particular speciality: it has a 200 square meter garden with almost 20 large trees making it a proper little forest in the middle of the city.
The house will host a small community of eight people and is built on common values and beliefs.
While social housing has a long tradition in Vienna, community building projects have only come up in the last century or so and they usually are newly-built structures. Many of the regulations and subsidies don't apply for older structures and the bureaucratic jungle surrounding them with it's winding paths and occasionally arbitrary ends are a beast to tame in its own right.
Luckily I completely underestimated the time and effort it takes to build such a place, otherwise I might have re-considered — hah! In earnest though, I again feel incredibly fortunate to be part of such an endeavour and to have a group of lovely humans who support each other. It is with much enthusiasm that I look forward to the steps we will take in this coming year.
Shiatsu
The third major focus last year was my Shiatsu training. I completed the second of three years last summer and continued my practice in regular intervals throughout the seasons.
I started building a personal wiki for the vast amount of knowledge that accompanies the training. While there is much left to do, I am content with the progress that I made.
It was the beginning of autumn — I started the third year of Shiatsu training and had just completed a nine day silent retreat — that I noticed that I was regularly feeling severely overwhelmed by the sheer amount of things to take care of and spend mental and physical capacity on. In this state I was hardly able to function: I felt frozen and numb, couldn't identify my needs or wants or make decisions based upon them. I lost my agency to take care of myself and in extension of others. Essentially I dissociated.
It was a dilemma: I knew I had to reduce capacity cost but felt utterly unable to make decisions, let alone major life decisions. All the things I was doing felt vitally important and thinking about the consequences of not continuing to do them just made things worse.
My sister seems to be going through curiously similar life phases parallel to me, told me of a simple strategy she used to deal with this sort of overwhelm: instead of looking at the bigger picture, she tried to scale any action down to the smallest steps involved.
Instead of asking "Should I continue training Shiatu?" I scaled down to "Do I want to participate in this weekend training in another town?". And when I couldn't answer because I was feeling conflicted, I scaled down further: "Do I want to pack my things? Do I want to buy a train ticket? Do I want to sit with others and have input?" And there I noticed that the majority of answers were simply "no". And so I didn't.
This form of small-scale decision making led to the bigger decision making itself: I paused the training in November. While a part of me was quite dissappointed in myself, it was quickly drowned out by the joy of returning capacities — being able to understand and express my needs and and being able to act upon them.
I continued to practice Shiatsu and will also continue my formal training when the time is right. For now, I am enjoying feeling like myself again.
Bullet Points
Community Housing
- Started a community housing project.
- Vetted ~10 different architects and found the right one to work with.
- Completed the renovation concept.
- Participated in a basic non-violent communication training.
- Completed a multitude of bureaucratic paperworks
- Attended ~30 project related meetings.
- Set up a workshop space in the basement.
- Attended a bunch of lovely gatherings for celebrations and social events like movie nights
Shiatsu
- Passed the anatomy exam.
- Built a website generator for the Shiatsu Wiki.
- Added loads of content to the Shiatsu wiki and illustrated a bunch of anatomy images.
- Participated in a week of Naikan.
- Gave 100 Shiatsu sessions.
- Paused formal training in October.
Other
- Started re-structuring Broken Rules.
- Acquired a Poucher Faltboot.
- Built two wooden swords for my son.
- Started a series of abstract paintings.
- Went Sailing and lost wallet, phone, knife, carkeys, calendar, sunglasses and shoes. Consequently replaced everyday items.
- Wrote a little cmus script to display album cover artwork.
- Vastly extended the mood tracker.
Personal Stats and Highlights
- Got divorced after a full year of negotiations.
- Tracked and completed over 800 tasks.
- Logged 365 days to the mood tracker.
- Practiced Qi Gong 117 times.
- Sent out ~40 Merveilles sticker sheets.
- Made little figurines out of self-made clay from the river banks.
- Spent lots of quality time with my son and working on projects creative together.
- Transported three cats from Crete to Austria.
Travels
- Marseille, Forcalquier, Limans & Les Magnans, France
- Krk, Croatia
- Stavrochori, Crete
- Hollenstein an der Ybbs, Austria
- Kleinkersee, Austria
Favorite Books
- Scattered Minds. The Origins and Healing of Attention Deficit Disorder: Gabor Maté. 2019
- more...
Favorite Albums
- Norken - Soul Static Bureau
- Tinariwen - Amatssou
- Ann Annie - El Prado
Favorite Movies/Series
- The Gesuidouz
- Sinners
- The Great
- more...
Other Things I enjoyed
- Traveling through Europe with my new partner, listening to audio books that teach us to understand ourselves and each other better and explore our relationship patterns with curiosity and love.
- Playing the violin on stage of a contemporary Kletzmer concert even though I don't play the violin. Dancing with the band afterwards.
- Discovering the world of (vegetarian) Ramen, hunting for Ramen bars and making some of my own.
- Full Broken Rules parents plus kids meeting, playing our old games together.
- Unexpectedly spending my birthday with so many lovely people.
- Spending quality me-time wildcamping, sailing, exploring abandoned places and doing art.
Personal Lessons & Realizations
- Neurodiversity isn't something that goes away or you "grow out of". I just learned to mask it and found compensation mechanism to deal with it.
- Ethical non-monogamy is not only viable alternative to the monogamous relationship model, but also one that I finally feel at home with.
- I am pretty good parent and don't need external validation for that anymore.
- Taking care of myself sometimes means making life more difficult for others — and that is ok.
- To understand my own needs and wants, I sometimes need to step out, get some quiet and listen. Usually I will be able to hear the answer then.
- Don't marry for romantic reasons or because you secretly hope it might fix something in your relationship.
Next year I would like to
- Form better habits around smartphone usage.
- Take more pictures with my camera again.
- Renovate as much as possible of the house.
- Take time to read more books again.
- Practice mediation and workout routines more regularly.
- Create more art and maybe do an exhibition?
- Build a tofu press and make tofu again.
- Maintain the nchrs wiki.
- Continue work on the shiatsu wiki.
- Restore the Poucher Faltboot and take it out for a camping trip.